Saturday, April 26, 2008

TAKING A LESSON FROM TOOLOOSE...IT'S ALL ABOUT MEEEEEEEEEE...

It's insidious. Compelling. I try to resist.
Try to be a reasonable person. A nice person. I ask how my friends are doing. How their kids are fairing in school. How the job is going. Whether they've ever been to London. Ever been nominated for the Orange Prize...Oh what's the Orange Prize you ask? Well let me tell you...

It's a voggy Saturday in KoOlina Harbor.
"How voggy?" I hear you ask.
Well...
THIS voggy.

Take a look at how fuzzy the Waianae Mountains are behind ORION. (I know those of you nameless-authors-in-the-trenches from CALGARY are laughing your ass off and saying "Those are NOT mountains...They're HILLS! And pretty crappy ones at that!"

Anyway never mind that. What you SHOULD be looking at are the brand new awesome sail covers ORION is sporting.

Can you spell D-I-S-T-R-A-C-T-E-D?

So I was asked to send a signed copy of LOTTERY to an auction for a very good cause -- and I did but I TOTALLY forgot to sign it. I had to send another...

Can you spell B-L-O-N-D-E- M-O-M-E-N-T?

So let's move on. I'm supposed to be doing my very last homework assignment from Dr Brown's class, but I am blogging instead.

Can you spell P-R-O-C-R-A-S-T-I-N-A-T-I-O-N?

I see a hand raised. A question in the back. Yes?
"What's vog?"
You weren't paying attention. We covered that months ago. It's when the volcano (Kilauea) is erupting on the Big Island of Hawaii and it shoots sulfer gasses into the air and the wind shifts coming from the southwest blowing it over Oahu and ergo on MEEEEEEEEEE.
Can you spell S-E-L-F A-B-S-O-R-B-E-D?



ME: How did I do?

TOOLOOSE: You're getting better but you need to add even more things about yourself. How you feel. What you're going through. Being an author and all... People are interested. Really. Do you think this couch throw makes me look fat?

17 comments:

Writer Babs said...

Don't forget to jump into the closest person's lap and demand to be loved and admired. I'm sure Tooloose is good at that one. :)

Bookfool said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Michelle H. said...

I was about to ask what "vog" was. Is there any other island words I missed before my days of blogging -I started in November last year?

Wow, Patricia, I'm surprised you didn't post anything about yourself. You were very humble when writing this. I might take a lesson from Toolouse. He's a very wise cat.

ORION said...

I know...I'm still learning from the master...

Sustenance Scout said...

But does he share your sense of humor, your wit, your charm? And your luck at not only seeing but photographing an orange dragonfly! You two make a great team! K.

Sandra Cormier said...

Does Tooloose jump into that pose EVERY time you take out the camera?

No mountains here. No hills, no volcanoes. Just a bump in the land they call an escarpment (I almost spelled escrapment).

Spring is here! Soon, it'll be as hot as Hawaii!

Heidi Willis said...

I spell this blog post H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S!

Chris Eldin said...

AHAHHAAHAHAHAHA!
Thanks for the morning laugh!!!
I'm glad you explained voggy.
:-)

nancorbett said...

Or, as The Princess always says to me, "Oh, are those papers distracting you? Here. Let me sit on them so you can better focus on MEEEEE."

Holly Kennedy said...

Tooloose, wind up and give that author sitting next to you a smack.

Tell her to get writing!
Calculate how much cat food and litter you're gonna need in 2009 and tell her she better get moving and stop staring at all that VOG :)

Kimber Li said...

Wow, you're a good speller. Aren't kitty cats also good at demonstrating how to just lie there and do absolutely nothing?

Travis Erwin said...

Maybe I need an all-knowing cat to guide me through life.

WendyCinNYC said...

That's ok, we are all allowed our "me" days, even humans.

I have LOTS of them.

Polly Kahl said...

Another funny, Pat. I want a Tooloose.

Tyhitia Green said...

I've been procrastinating myself. :*)

We love hearing about you. Tooloose is a savvy cat.

Anonymous said...

Dear Pat,
We want to know about your quirks. Although I suspect that a woman who lives on a boat in Hawaii with cats and who spends her free time inventing whole people with richly detailed imaginary lives might not have anywhere to go with this--I've tagged you with a fun, easy (I swear) quirks meme anyway.

Jess said...

Great post, great blog. I love your cats, and I also loved the post about Ella. Thank you. :)