Friday, May 02, 2008

OH LOOK HONEY...A HERD OF PALM TREES GRAZING IN THE DISTANCE...

How peaceful they appear. SHHHHH! Don't move. You'll scare them.


There's a fun contest over at BENCH PRESS. Chris sent around some authorly silly questions a while back. Your mission is to match the writer with the response.
I read them again and ended up laughing hysterically cuz I couldn't remember what I said.

I had to clean ORION today. Our boat sitter (for when we're in London) is coming for the weekend for a practice run. Tooloose and Girl Kitty are kicked out of the forward berth. I moved their beds to the salon settee. I had to put a cushion between them so they wouldn't fight.


It's not that simple to boat sit. First of all you can't forget you're floating otherwise that first step out of the cockpit is a real surprise.

When you walk through the doorways you have to turn to the side or your shoulders will become bruised and you'll look like you've been in a bar fight.

The refrigerator is so small that when you open the door everything will come at you like there's a poltergeist inside.

And the head. What can I tell you about the head? It's so small you can pee, brush your teeth and take a shower all at the same time. This is not as convenient as one might think.

Then there are the sounds: The clicking of the snapping shrimp against the hull. The rumbling of the fishing boat engines as they go out at 5 am. The gurgle gurgle gurgle of the sump and the screaming bilge alarm.

And those little oddities...peculiarities...
For instance.
If you flush the toilet the stove turns off.

You can't use and microwave and the coffee maker at the same time or all the power goes off.

ORION has quite a sense of humor.
So how about you? Think Tooloose could whip you into shape to be a boat sitter?

12 comments:

Les said...

I'd be there in a NY minute! I even know all about bilge pumps and generators.

Have fun in London! I'm rootin' for ya!!!!!!!

ChrisEldin said...

I love your descriptions about the noises! While being able to picture the small bathroom, etc., I wouldn't have thought about the noises you'd hear on the water.

Thanks for the shout-out! Your name is now in the trusty hat.
:-)

Have fun in London!!!

Leatherdykeuk said...

Good luck on your trip :)

The Writers' Group said...

I grew up on and around boats (my Dad is a commercial fisherman) and your descriptions are pretty familiar. Something you forgot are the odors: diesel fuel, low tide, rotting shellfish, fog (very distinct scent), coffee, moldering fabric, the ocean itself(one of my favorite smells, right up there with horses).

I'll be thinking of you as you step foot in London. I want so badly for you to win! In many ways, I guess you already have.

Amy MacKinnon

ORION said...

We have more sailboats here in Hawaii so not so much diesel smell although when there was a fuel spill it got rather noxious.
The low tide smell that you get on the mainland is not here either- our tidal change is very small...ditto rotting shellfish- people are disappointed at the fact the shells on our beaches are few and far between- I get them mainly diving...
But coffee...
yes...
there is the coffee...

Lisa R said...

I really thought you were joking when you told me about the snapping shrimp! But, they do exist and they do sound very like an electrical short. I would have been very nervous if I heard it and you hadn't warned me! Who would have thought? Seriously, Orion is COOL and I am really looking forward to taking care of your floating home while you are gone. WIN BIG!!!!!!!

Mary Witzl said...

I love the smell of fish mixed with diesel and sea spray and fresh coffee. That and the ocean would make up for the other inconveniences.

And your cats are great! I love the shot of the cat in its wee life preserver, and the belly-up pose too. Only a really happy, comfortable cat will reveal its belly so freely.

Chumplet said...

Your description of the boat sounds like a lot of cottages in Northern Ontario during flood season.

Good luck in London, dear.

Holly Kennedy said...

Been on that boat. Heard those sounds. Fought hard to close that fridge door. I could SO boat sit that floating vessel!

Matter of fact, I think I'd be AWESOME at it. I know for sure I'd at least remember to shut the trap-door thingee up top so the cats don't get out at night.

Unlike Pat.
Who forgot one night and blamed it on her husband when I woke them up for help!

ORION said...

Hahahahaha
I remember that...
Let me see...
does ORION move?

Travis Erwin said...

You mean you're not sailing to London? Fine, just let the Panama canal sit there unused.

Wendy Pinkston Cebula said...

I'd be happy to swap my apartment for a week on your boat. Sounds fabulous.