I took Anti-Wife to my favorite Heiau in the mountains of Pupukea.
We talked about home remodeling, writing, how beautiful Oahu is, writing, how fun it is to go holo holo (play hooky), writing, what wine we should buy (white), writing, how Tooloose is even stranger than I describe him, writing, how much fun it is to sit on ORION and listen to the water, and oh yes...writing.
The conversation turned to Tooloose and his Alien Space Monkey Memoir...
We waited until Tooloose left the room.
Anti-Wife: "How's it coming?"
PW: "Not good. He needs several more revisions, has an enormous amount of tense errors as cats live entirely in the present. This becomes problematic in a memoir. Plus he's never actually been an Alien Space Monkey."
Anti-Wife:"Have you explained it to him? Talked to him about it? I mean he has a real advantage living with a published author."
PW: "I know. I know, but he doesn't listen to me. When I make suggestions he just says we disagree stylistically."
Anti-Wife: "It is hard when writers can't take constructive criticism isn't it? Maybe it's you. Maybe he'll listen to me?"
PW: "Here. Read his first prologue and see what you think."
Anti-Wife: "First prologue? What do you mean by first prologue?"
PW: "He's not using chapters. He's doing everything in prologues. You know. Prologue 1, prologue 2, prologue 3..."
ALIEN SPACE MONKEY MEMOIR BY TOOLOOSE STEINBECK SPARKS ROBERTS HEMINWAY STEELE WOOD
dem monkeeze am scaree. I iz one a dem too. I haz get space ship fast. eat fud. have no thumb lak dem so can not shut lazy gun.
play wit dem tails.
I no eat bananaz.
PW: "I know Anit-Wife. I cried too..."
Okay bloggers. Tooloose may listen to you. Can you give him a hand with his edits?