Friday, February 15, 2008

YOU CAN'T GET THERE FROM HERE...OR...WHERE IN THE WORLD IS THE AUTHOR PATRICIA WOOD?

A new take on WHERE'S WALDO

10 am and 81 degrees.
So I get an overnight FED EX package from NEW YORK.
I open it up.
A large yellow envelope slips out addressed to:
PATRICIA WOOD AUTHOR OF LOTTERY
and PUTNAM'S address.
Rachel my editor's very uber rock assistant sends me a note attached.
"FAN MAIL," she writes.
"HOW COOL," I thought which makes me think of my friend who lives in ALASKA.
The Yellow Envelope contains a smaller white envelope - this was becoming kind of like those wooden RUSSIAN DOLLS that get tinier and tinier as you open them up.
It's been marked "RETURN TO SENDER."
Because it's addressed to"PATRICIA WOOD AUTHOR OF LOTTERY KOOLINA HAWAII
That's all.
I open it up.
It's a note.
As I read, I could feel my head swell. After I SLAPPED MYSELF AS HOLLY ALWAYS WANTS TO DO and re read some negative reviews it went right back to NORMAL.
The scene from the Oscars came to mind.
"YOU LIKE ME...YOU REALLY LIKE ME..."
A writer is so alone when they're creating a novel. When I'm working I'm engrossed in my story and loving it but I have no idea how anyone else is going to like it.
THE REST OF THE STORY.
The return address of the note?
Is Honolulu, Hawaii.
This lovely note traveled around Hawaii. Flew to New York back and forth. And arrived back to ME.
How cool is that.
So I'm sure you ALL have stories about mail malfunction.
Bring it on...

14 comments:

Sustenance Scout said...

No wild mail stories, Patricia, just happy to see you were treated to a nice pick-me-up after yesterday's sadness. Hugs from Denver, K.

Lisa R said...

Well, I had a certain Express mail company which will remain nameless send a package from Honolulu that was bound to Lahaina, Maui (still Hawaii by the way) all the way to Lincoln, Nebraska...where they lost it for three days. It finally arrived on Maui five days after I'd sent it! That's truly EXPRESS!

Kim Stagliano said...

Fan mail! COOL! One year I forgot to mail all my Christmas cards (and buy them and address them) and they never arrived. Bad postal service! ;)

BClark said...

Mail problems, who me?? Why would I since I live in Iowa and my mail is sent to Minnesota! I have an ongoing letter writing campaign asking to have an Iowa address so I might actually get things that are sent. Or, even better my taxes get paid to the state where I live, or I can have an Iowa phone number for my cell. The plus side is that no one can find me, not UPS, Fedex, satellite installers, muggers. This is my first experience with rural mail and it ain't fun. I am used to the nice mail person coming to my door and putting my mail right where I can reach it. Ah, well I will survive, just exercise my aggravation nerve now and then.
Love You tooloose picture, cracked me up. Barbara

The Anti-Wife said...

Hmmmm. Let me see? There's something about a package sent to a certain friend that the post office said was undeliverable but which was actually sitting on the steps in her local post office branch and..................

ORION said...

oh such good mail stories...what about the one when the letter arrives like 40 years later?
Who has one of those stories?

ORION said...

er uh yeah ANTI WIFE... I conveniently forgot about that! LOL

Chumplet said...

Heh, heh... you stole my line, or rather Ms. Field's line.

I got an email from a girl named Cathie when my book was first released. She said she liked the cover and that the book was on a wish list. I wonder if she ever bought it? Maybe I should email her.

I once sent a card to Barrie, thirty miles north of my town. It took two weeks to get there via Ottawa.

Meanwhile, stuff from the States takes three days, and a book I sent to my aunt in NZ only took a week, regular post.

Travis Erwin said...

stories about mail malfunction

Oh, I got stories but since I get a paycheck signed US Postal Service I better keep my mouth shut.

Sam said...

That is so sweet!!!!!

Most mail malfuctions for me result in no mail arriving. When I was in Argentina, my dad and mom both sent packages for the twins. Neither package Ever arrived.
:-(

Oh, and the weekend after my wedding, I sat down and wrote all my thank you cards. I took the pile to the post office, and posted it. There was a huge mail strike. Some of my notes didn't arive until YEARS later. They'd obviously been shoved into a dark corner and forgotten. I remember one woman asking me very pointedly if I had gotten her gift. I ended up writing some thank you notes twice.

mlh said...

A mail malfunction? Let's me think of one . . .

I ordered some music cds once. The shipment got filled in Ohio and then had to pass through Pennsylvania to a UPS facility in New Jersey for sorting. Afterward, the package again passed through the Keystone State on a trip back to Ohio to a mail distribution center. Then the package was sent to me.

Where do I live? Why, Pennsylvania, of course.

Ello said...

What a lovely surprise! How much fan mail do you get? I just finally did my Amazon review for Lottery. For some reason, I thought I did it a long time ago and I was on it to send a copy to my friend and I realized, I never reviewed it! So I did. I loved that book.

ORION said...

Thanks ello!!! You totally ROCK.
Hey all you anonymous lurkers...feel free to comment - I won't bite
much

Holly Kennedy said...

I have no 'misdirected mail'
stories quite like this yet I'm sure Canada Post isn't any better than the US postal service when it comes to staying on their toes and getting it right.

Have a good weekend!