Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Everything You Wish For Might Just Possibly...

This is my old horse Airborne caught in the act of being naughty, with all four feet off the ground.
An example of exultation or chagrin? Caught in the act of joy. Or disobedience?
I guess it depends on your perspective. It is all relative to who you are.
Are you the horse? With exuberance. With elation. Taking a risk.
Or the rider. With caution. With control. Playing it safe.
Which are you?
And more to the point...which am I?

5:30 am and 74 degrees.
It's official.
My agent has submitted my manuscript to a selection of editors. I am being circumspect here.
Blogs appear to be an excellent excuse to make personal information public and that is not my intent here.
My intent is to show the process.
The road.
The mental angst.
And angst it is.
It is pure pain.
And pleasure. A lot of pleasure.
To use a cliche?
The brass ring is in sight, but just out of reach. It is coming closer. Or is it?
I now have magical thinking.
If I approach a stoplight and it stays green, I will be published next year.
If I find a penny to wish on, I keep it in a box in my cabin (bedrooms are called cabins on a boat).
I try not to think of what might be and have appreciation for what is - but -
It is hard. It is nerve wracking. It is a thousand times worse than searching for an agent and a thousand times better.
It is a waiting game.
So I wait.
Bereft of any control.
Except one.
I am still writing.

Think good thoughts...


Kimber An said...

Hang in there! One of the things I learned in nanny school many moons ago was that, for young children, a project is all in the process - not the product. Since my job was to care for children full-time and, later, raise children as stay-at-home mom (on-duty 24/7) I've pretty much adopted that attitude. It's made my life with children and otherwise much easier. Enjoy the process. Have fun smearing the paint around, feeling the squishiness with your fingers. Smell the roses. Getting there is half the fun. Okay, now I'm slipping into cliche'! But, that was the only advise I could think of giving as someone who has no real idea of what you're going through. ;)

ORION said...

Thanks Kimber an!

Anonymous said...

That is so exciting!
I can only imagine the butterflies and such. I think "Enjoy the process" is excellent advice. You can stress and wonder if anyone other that you or your agent like the story you are trying to tell, or you can sit back, write other things, and watch the process as a bystander, learning from the whole thing.
Personally, I can't wait to buy your book!

ORION said...

Thanks! I feel like I have my own personal cheerleaders!

Bernita said...

Good thoughts.
Slightly green ones, but still, good thoughts.

Michelle said...

Wishing you all the best in your journey. I'm with Kimber An, just enjoy the process -- there will be great moments (and not so great) along the way -- just embrace it all and learn all you can from each moment! What's the manuscript about -- if I may ask.

Anonymous said...

Ok - fingers and toes and eyes are crossed for luck!!!!
Darn it's hard to type like this!
Can't wait to hear MORE!